Friday, May 3, 2019

Beaver Land by Ben

Beaver Land.


I part the leaves of the bush only to find.

A land of beaver like creatures scattered over the
never ending land.

The smell of smoke and rotten carcasses rushes
over the land of weird creatures.

I hear this sound it’s like native drums Bommmb!   
Bommmb! It shakes the ground.

I don't know what this is but it’s not normal.


By Ben.-

2 comments:

  1. What a poetic and intense story Ben. I can see you've worked hard to use richly descriptive words which speak across several senses. I wonder if you could make your last sentence even more powerful by saying how not knowing might make you might feel? Confused? Afraid? What else?
    I'd love to know the beaver-like creatures would be called? Can you think of a suitable name?
    Well done and keep rising to the Challenge.

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  2. hi Ben..

    I part the bush only to find. doesn't ´t make sense

    But I really like the rest of your story :)

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